*Originally Written 10/18/2009*
On the latest episode of Grey's Anatomy Christina Yang (sandra oh) raised the question "What am I fighting for?"
Just for some back story: Christina is a heart surgeon and it is also her passion. She was training under one of the best cardiac specialists in the country but due a broken engagement (her own) he left and his replacement just really didn't like her and shut her out every chance she got. So in the long run (in this case 2 whole seasons) Christina was just working a job and not building her career. When the hospital had to merge with its competitor doctors were fighting to keep their jobs and Christina found herself fighting, pretty severely, for things she never even cared about. And it was when she lost the battle that she finally asked "What am I fighting for?"
Travelers if you wanna talk about light bulb...even as I type this I am sitting in my car stuffed with a good 80% of my belongings, locked out of an apt where I sleep on the couch.
I was in this exact same spot 3 years ago in Atlanta where I also fought until financially I just couldn't handle the cost of the war. So after watching Grey's and sitting in my car locked out I had to ask myself "what am I fighting for?" I have a family that loves me and I can go home to them without any judgment or love lost. However I will say that this time I think there is a clearer vision to my journey. That the motivators for its existence are a lot more justifiable than when I moved to Atlanta. But there are times, especially like tonight when I look at my car with all my stuff, the couch that I sleep on, and my bank account and ask "What am I fighting for?"
Travelers its okay to ask that question. But also ask are you working a job, or building a career? If its the latter then your fight is justifiable. If it is the former take a pit stop and redirect your route when you have a clearer sense of your Point B.
I have to remember, I have my first position in the Industry, I just haven't started yet and even if that falls through, which it won't (optimism) I'm still tutoring and can make just enough money to gas up the Black Thunder and drive on home.
What am I fighting for? A career in the fashion industry that allows me to use both my degrees in International Business and Product Development. I really like both Branding and Production and Sourcing so we shall see but despite what it looks like on the surface I think I'm doing the right thing.
"One Step Forward, Just Glance Back. No Fear, Just DIVA!"